i just realized i've been trying to levitate the potatoe chip out of her hand for the past ten minutes. i think i smoked to much.
blowing a .13 at 10 AM isn't nearly as cool as I thought it would be.
ive got a scarf tied around my face holding bags of hashbrowns to it, im too boss to care
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
Oh my god. A memory of last night just came to me. One of our neighbors joked about Thomas having a big dick and I just kept shaking my head profusely.
Apparently getting a blow job in the mens room from the bar owners daughter will get you kicked out.
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
Just saw a rice crispy commercial and got emotional. I need to go home.
I think my sex life is about to turn into a war on two fronts
Shower wine is way better than shower beer.
I feel you. I woke up butt naked on top of my sheets with a plate of cheese next to my bed...
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
Tell me not to drink and get on ladders. I think I need the reminder.. I'm clumsy enough sober.
He was eating me out on a picnic table on the frame lake trail and right after I came, a group of hikers walked around the corner. Stood up just in time
And this is one of the many reasons why you need a car.
Randomize
