Christians are straight up FREAKS
Just saw my boss eat a banana in three bites.
After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
The only way im leaving this casino is in a golden chariot or an ambulance
at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
You know how hard it is to jerk off in a bathtub with a dog staring at you?
At one point they were sandwiching me, both petting my stomach, mad dogging each other. Then they somehow telepathically decided to both try to pull my pants down. Such nice guys.
I'm eating ramen over the toilet. Fuck my life
oh my god I have a fantastic druncle story to tell you. It involves a burrito, a meltdown and a bear
The burrito and meltdown are standard, but I'm intrigued by the bear
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
jusy threw up in the airport bathroom. I am no longer thankful for fireball.
This is what we get for finishing a whole box of Franzia by ourselves
I made him leave to get me chicken nuggets so I could have sex with his roommate
Randomize