You ran away and I found you three blocks later lying by a dumpster because "that's where your life belongs"
she was trying to give me a handjob in biology class while we were learning about the penis.
my ex just saw me in his brothers bed. fuck yes revenge feels good
just got carried INTO the bar by 4 people. it's like watching my weekend in reverse.
When the officer tried to stop you, you just shouted your name in his face. repeatedly.
I try to help out whenever I can. Speaking of rough nights I woke up half naked on Brady's couch with bloody paper towels duct taped to my foot.
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
If a raisin and a desert had a bastard child that would be the inside of my mouth right now
Could you imagine living in a city where bartenders are available by 1:30 AM
I'd have like 4 kids by now and at least one std
Also... I'm unsure what to do with my face while someone is choking me during sex. Like I feel like its hard to look flattering.
The teenager outdrank all of us. All. Of. Us. I woke up and she was getting everyone water and fruit snacks. I give up.
best way to lose double chin? blow jobs. I am fucking hurting.
The ecstacy made me so dehydrated I started licking condensation off car windows
My v day was great. There's a cum stain in the shape of a handprint on my sheets
His relationship is over as soon as he sees my boobs. I’m going to titty fuck my way into his heart
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