I asked my mom, she said yes...but you have to shower with grandpa.
Unmistakable female orgasm noises coming from upstairs shower
She must've brought a toy -- seriously doubt that he's up to the task
Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
We were drinking cognac with TAB. I felt like trailer park royalty.
How the fuck did I get small bruises all over my body?
Well you were laying on the couch naked after the girls left, staring into space, and I went over to the pool table and threw every ball as hard as I could at you from point blank range . You didn't flinch, blink, or scream for any of them. next time maybe you won't fuck my girl while I'm taking a shit
It was awful until we put her on a word ration. And she rationed her words accordingly. I love blondes.
I was just "that girl you seen blowing some dude outside when you drove by"
He just kept yelling "body massage machine go" at random intervals throughout the night
why the fuck are my pubes caked with bread crumbs?
Where is a good place to buy a New Year's outfit that acknowledges I don't have tits but screams I suck dick like a champ?
OH DEAR GOD. He looks like if u licked him he'd taste like bourbon, sex and sunshine.
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
Did u puke in a church parking lot? And go to the wrong funeral yesterday? Lol
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
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