im gay
i know
yea but for you.
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
Goldfish can't live in a bowl filled with tequila, lesson learned.
got woken up at 7:30 by a drunk girl asking me where she was... apparently she slept on my futon
she was in a cheetah costume
Oh my fucking god I saw the pictures. What the mother fucking fuck. Destroy the pictures. Destroy the fucking pictures.
Please confirm the destruction of the pictures. NOW.
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
As a Chick-Fil-A employee, I think you'd appreciate the visual of me almost accidentally pulling out my wallet with a thong hooked on it as I payed for my waffle fries just now.
Got a 72 hour restraining order. Can we meet monday? Let me know!
No but I was fuckin done when I realized my acrylic nail caught fire when I was hitting the bong.
I seriously had alll four of your knuckles bruised into my arm
I need you to go into my room and get some pants then bring them and four band aids to Sam's apartment no questions
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
Would it be weird if I bought knee pads and shin guards to fuck in my car?
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
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