it was the least impressive dick i've ever seen... and i've changed babies' diapers.
I envy your ability to put any word in front o the word beer and make drinking before 5 sound like a socially sanctioned event.
Seriously? Do you have me saved in your phone as 'check every 3 months to see if she's single yet'?
She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just watched a blind kid buy from one of the vending machines on campus...guess there's nothing like a good surprise?
Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
Oh no it's bring yor chld to work day...I'm too drunk for this
I just had someone I don't even know on Facebook message me saying it seems like I drink too much and should slow down.
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This bitch rocks a fuckin fanny pack and still manages to lose her phone at every thirsty thursday
I just spent 20 minutes in a Subway trying to take a candid photo of the doppleganger of the guy I lost my virginity to instead of eating. That's all the evidence I need that my life is on track.
There should be a promo code on the Papa Johns website for "I have no moneys but if you send a cute delivery guy I will pay him in blow jobs."
Okay so, sorry but last night we had to put a note on your chest and a key around your neck just so you would make it home.
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
I mean, it's good for a lot of things. Just not the inside of your vagina
Well neither is bbq sauce but I dont judge kinks
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