if i'm ever as drunk as the girl in front of me... kill me.
Nothing is worse than puking naked in front of strangers
I would give my right arm to go back to college. Or maybe not. Would be kinda hard to pick up guys with one arm. Then again, knowin what I do now...I could take any freshman bithc with only one arm.
She has her iPod in her ears slippers and sweats on and is walking around the house up and down the stairs getting "exercise" she just stopped for a water break
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
every time I see Anne Hathaway all I can think is "my cousin fucked a guy who fucked her" and it makes me proud.... so I want to say thank you for being that cousin.
despite contrary belief, getting peanut butter off your balls is not as easy as it sounds
should my penis look like a turkey
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
She took a crow from her moms Halloween decorations, taped it to her shoulder, went to the bar and made the guys buy a drinks for both her and the crow.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He walked away from the girl that just blew him to hook up with another girl, and when she got pissed he just turned around and screamed, "SHE IS LIKE 10X HOTTER THAN YOU!" Then she went on an angry dick sucking rampage. There were 4 victims.
Please don't place wagers on my sex life unless you are giving me a cut. With my current sluttiness I feel like I deserve 40% for how much money you'll make
i'll talk to you in three hours when you've stopped foaming at the mouth and your eyes have rolled back into place
I don't think I bit anyone but I woke up to scrapes knees, bruises and new friends.
Well just give me the address, I'll bring the bourbon. If they let that into mental institutions
I would just like to say that I had morning sex today to the Hamilton soundtrack. So.
Randomize