would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
He keeps saying he loves me and ruining perfectly good conversations.
Thats about the time I should have known you would run around naked and try to make out with my sleeping mother
Someone just asked me to go to the dining hall for dinner and he will use one of his swipes to pay for my meal. i think this is a college version of a date
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
Been in the ER for 3 hours now. This hospitals transition to paperless is not going well. But my doctor looks like Elton John and just gave me percocet
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
You kept screaming, "Fuck her right in the personality" and then kissed a guy and slapped him across the face
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
I HAVE DISCOVERED LONDON AND IT FILLS ME WITH JOY
i was watching the elves fighting on my knees while waiting for the shrooms to kick in then i realized
It's a testament to the kinds of spouses/parents we will be that we get so wasted but still show up to every class on time. We honor our commitments bitches!
she bought my drinks all night, made me breakfast in the morning, and let me use her expensive hair products before i left. best one night stand ever.
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