just caught grandpa beating off in the living room
i'm so high i feel like the people i'm chatting with online can some how see that i'm naked.
just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
I can't cum and do my makeup at the same time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ill trade u your bra for a run to the liquor store...
hotel security told us you walked into the hotel with blood all over your dress, weren't wearing any underwear and were escorted back by three men who were believed to be "homosexuals".
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
The nurse who basically saved my life just came into the store. Didn't recognize her. Awwwwkward.
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm just a little drunk right now and I have to work at 3
Omg sara
I ran out of milk and it's hot and I was thirsty
Babies are disgusting. I held one once. Then I washed my hands and rinsed my mouth out with wine.
Your rough animalistic sex sounds are disrupting my cocktail hour
I mean I only got hit in the ass with ONE firework
I was so fucked up last night that I peed on his FATHER'S BED and fell asleep there. and yes. his father was asleep in the bed
Is using La Croix as a mixer for vodka a legit way to reach my daily water consumption?
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