only if we run a train.
done.
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
It was like fucking a house. Down the chimney. That deep and empty.
They sat at the bar while we waited for a table. When the hostess came to seat us, they were shitfaced, and swordfighting wth chop sticks.
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
I just Tebowed the shit out of her.
Nice and you can't use "Tebow" in the place of every verb.
HURRY. I NEED DRUNK. MORE DRUNK.
I know you all think its cute to drop me off in a different state when I black out, but I can't wake up in family campgrounds asking where I am. These parents are scared.
Just FYI, by the transitive property my breasts have now touched the Stanley Cup.
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
I just want my kids to know I fucked some really hot dudes before their father.
You're going to scar your kids
He asked if I was a pirate because my "arrrrrrrrse" was worth burying. 10/10 for effort, 20/10 for serial killer vibes.
So when did "Are you okay?" translate into "Don't tell me you got fucked by another rando after another rager"?
Well I didn't spend $7 on an Uber just to get limp dick
Is there a number of dicks a girl can have in a weekend before it becomes unacceptable? Asking for a friend
Remember! It’sa long weekend and a holiday weekend and it’s America’s birthday! So don’t short change me!
I thought you were asking for a friend
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