Thought you might like this. Had a dance off with an andy bernard look alike and pissed my bed. All in one night.
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
Woke up naked in another mans house. If that keeps happening, then I probably need to go gay. You know to make it ok.
Talking about the game in the closet with a banana wearing sunglasses.
he has a knack for choosing the worst time to masturbate
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
We jumped on a random trolley because total strangers offered us free vodka. We're not even on the route map as far as I can tell. I see now how those people died in "Hostel"... we deserve whatever happens to us tonight.
Thanks, girl! That means a lot. I can't wait to share my jail stories with you over salad and cupcakes.
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
Yeah.. I'm sorry I broke your phone. But in my defense you handed me the frying pan.
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
If you're with any of them tell them i apologize for (insert whatever i did here)
Im drunk taking pregnancy tests with this really hot girl...i dont know what is happening
Then it hit me - his penis wasn't a shiny new toy anymore and I wanted a new one.
Randomize
