yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
I'm so glad you managed to take a picture of your foreskin before you broke my camera.
Life after highschool has not been kind to her. She looked fatter than Luke Wilson's face in those AT&T commercials.
Im so hungover that my 6 year old cousine made me aspirine and coffee out of playdoh...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just called shotgun on the way to the squad car.
i wrote down the address for planned parenthood on the back of the receipt for the condom that broke
You have proved your worthiness to join me on the quest of taking shots at every academic building on campus by showing up drunk to our test at 12:30 today
Dear Beer Goggles, it's time to see the eye doctor. With love, your biggest fan.
PLEASE DON'T BE HEARTLESS COME AND GET ME FROM THE BAR I'M HIGH AS SHIT AND I LOST MY SHOES
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
YOU'RE CHANGING THE SUBJECT. I CAN BLOW SOMETHING UP OR I CAN TELL HIM YOU LOVE HIM, BUT ONE OF THE TWO IS BOUND TO HAPPEN
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
Somehow, you looked so classy chugging that bottle of wine last night.
I'm trying to secure Christmas dick. Idgaf if he has strep or not.
I just want a guy who makes lots of money, has a skilled penis and the sex drive of a 22 year on Viagra. Is that too much to ask?
Randomize