I might come over and watch a movie but I can't spend the night. my parents would wonder where i was
you're 26.
i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
So the chick throws up over the rail from the 15th floor at the sky bar and I knew I would take her back to my hotel.
I'm cleaning my apartment while naked. Anyone who says that's not why they want to live on their own is lying.
I sang Sweet Caroline with a homeless man and made him 25 bucks. Redbull vodka gives you wings!
First thing that comes on in the morning is kanye's I can't hold my liquor. yeezus lives.
Got stiff armed by the garbage man on the back of the truck...I just wanted to ride one block dude
I'm drunk from drinking bourbon out of a "cupcake sippy cup" at the Denny's bar. What the fuck happened to the goals I had?
I mean, the night I fell out of that bus I made you pour vodka onto my wound to clean it, then duct taped a paper towel to my hand and kept drinking.
I just stole a bunch of balloons from a birthday party and am giving one to each person at the bar.
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
i look like i'm walk-of-shaming but i'm really showered and re-clothed and rallying. i fool everyone
I'm laying backwards. On the stairs. Eating carrots. And drinking from a captain Morgan bottle.
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