Think I'm gonna go cougar hunting tonight... Any advice?
condoms and good judgment
Can I buy both of those at the same store?
becoming an adult blows. i don't think its possible for me to wake up for anything that doesn't involve kegs and eggs or half naked bums passed out in our yard.
Because the last time i saw or spoke to him he came all over me in a hammock.
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
At what point would you like us to save you from yourself?
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
It's Been a while since I puked in vomit bush. I hope it doesn't feel neglected
I just slipped on ice and peed on my pea coat. There's a pun there but I'm too sad to make it
If he can't cook well I'm just gonna buy a RealDoll and twenty cats and live my own fucking life
So I just had breakfast and then sex in a parking garage before he went to school and thus I am loving my life
Would you think less of me if I said I was eating a toaster strudel in the bath.
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
It just so happens all of their names are Ryan, so I never have to change whose name I moan.
You passed out in my backseat like a legitimate infant. A really drunk, really horny infant
Randomize
