oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
Theres a picture of you standing next to a John Wayne cardboard cutout that says dont drink and drive. your buddy is shirtless holding a beer and youre holding your keys up with marker on your face.
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
YOU RECOMMENDED ME TO THIS GIRL BECAUSE SHES A STRIPPER AND YOU KNOW MY WEAKNESS FOR STRIPPERS WITH CHILDREN.
What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.
I forgot to tell you about my 7:30am Sunday morning run to the local convenience store to buy condoms, a du-rag and a shot glass
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
jake and the teradactyl broke up, operation get high and find him a new girl who hasn't had sexual experiences with three delts simultaniously is in full effect.
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
He simply fell in the fire, rolled out and continued to finish his bottle of vodka. Everyone else instantly sobered up just watching it.
I'm also sorry that I ate your chicken sandwich while you were throwing up....
i feel sensations at the ends of my beard. Either I am super high. Or my face has accepted my beard and I completed my transformation to Mecca
WTF I can't even get a boyfriend here and you're getting nudes from across the country
Bring me pizza. I'll trade you your underwear you left here for 2 slices.
My boss's toddler just went through my bag and found your vibrator...you owe me a drink.
Randomize
