Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
Then he told me he was proud of me for remembering that i blew him that night.. Maybe my drinking is getting out of hand.
We all know tonight is going to end like every other night with you. drunk, pantless and confused. Dont try to switch things up.
I can't take any time off so I'll be here drinking mimosas til I puke at home with my kitty
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
sorry to break it to you, but he's definitely fucking that other girl now...
I wish I still at least had the bruises on my ass to remember him by.
I'm never drinking again. I saw way more penises than I ever cared to see last night. And I've decided that I'm going to live in Scotland.
I need an explanation for both of these epiphanies.
But see that's the thing. I know i'm better looking than you, I just want you to be continually in a state of shock and awe that you could ever get a girlfriend this hot. You know?
I put ketchup in a girls hair last night. I need a sorry balloon
I was 100% done.. I used my vibrator while eating cold pizza. Shit was magical.
We can talk about your dick in my throat after a decision is made, this is my hair we're talking about. .. shit's important.
Trust me.. Might look gay.. Might feel gay... But I could snap your neck with my inside thighs bro
It still amazes me Mike had to have neck surgery after eating me out so much.
Randomize
