Medical school killed my enjoyment of porn. Hard to keep a boner when you're diagnosing all the actor's STDs and skin disorders.
i was the DD for the swedish students tonight. Got paid 23 dollars for driving 10 miles. gotta love ignorance and the confusion conversion brings.
I'm going to start giving girls scratch off lottery tickets when they leave my place in the am. That way they have a chance of not regretting the night before
The last thing I remember is yelling "ill handle this" while wearing a lion suit and holding a jug of vodka when the RAs came
I was freaked out. No man over 50 is allowed to touch me. Ever. Unless you're Michael Bolton. Then please do.
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
The fact that I'm going to be living with you is starting to make me worry about my heatlh.
Ya that ship has sailed dude
I got laid while wearing a shirt with a picture with my little brother deep throating a banana on it.
I just need some dick and some jimmy johns
He said I gave him the best head he's ever had and I bowed. I BOWED.
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
At the bar in my pajamas again
Ummm that is the 3rd time this week and it is Wednesday
He just stopped in the middle of undressing for sex to dip his slice of pizza in ranch. I think I’m in love.
Randomize
