There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
My lack of memory is directly related to being friends with you.
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
i just saw some one pass a baby through the drive-thru window at dairy queen.
It's an open bar on a yacht... I'm going to drown.
I keep calling his kid the wring name. This is not helping my cause. And by cause mean his dick
We had three bowls going. It was a tri-bowl tournament. Harry potter shit.
I'm going to make "gut the love salmon" a common slang term for sex. Spread the word.
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
So do you remember the bartender that caught me when I fell off the bar 4 weeks ago? He hasn't been to work since...Woops.
Last night I somehow got INCREDIBLY wasted & thought it was a good idea to make a group chat with all the guys I'm hooking up with and just say "bye." soo I'm hiding out till next week.
I have a guy for practically everything... except for making me waffles on demand. will u be my waffle guy?
At least Shia Labeouf would encourage me to do this drinking contest
GO RIDE HIS EYEBROWS INTO THE SUNSET
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
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