i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
9 of the 12 girls i had sex with in college are on facebook
it was an ugly road back then. i'm sure time hasn't been friendly.
It could have went better. They kicked us out of the casino and I drunkenly whipped her across the face with a fishing pole. Long story.
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
I had a dream about masturbating with toys I can't afford.
My sex life and finances are equally in shambles.
No, they seem attractive after SIX beers, after three they're just the gender you're looking for.
My manager just held my hair while I threw up in a dumpster. New low.
I was gonna be Romantic and write your name in emoji eggplants but A's are hard
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
I should know better than to open your texts at the grocery store
THAT'S NOT NICE
NEITHER WAS PROMISING NOT TO TAKE MY SISTER'S VIRGINITY, THEN PROMPTLY DOING SO
Well Jon got a DUI sleeping in the back seat so I thought the trunk was safer. BUT WHO CARES WHY JUSE PLEASE COME LET ME OUT!
I'm always down for nudity.
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