Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
my ex gf has sooo many hot friends... i feel like im at a grocery store when on her fb... just shopping around.
All i learned in high school was how to sell drugs
I should have some sort of frequent buyer card or something. I just bought my third bottle of Captain this week. It's Wednesday.
My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
Vodka and Eggs at 9:30AM = thank you, America.
He told me to fuck off at some point in the night. I think it was right before he jumped out of a moving car trying to get to another bar and made Abby cry.
you're expensive. Idk about all this. What happened to free make outs?
Sobriety and mild self-respect
When my parents ask if I met any nice guys in California, I'm going to answer, "No, but I have gone home with alot of nice girls". Too much, too soon?
Can we make 2014 the year of no unsolicited dick pics?
We joked about how funny it would be if he got pulled over with 300 breakfast burritos in hus car. We walk outside of the school just as the police lights turn on and pull him over
Well I'm about 60% wine, 30% pure rage and 10% tears at the moment and I'm disappointed in how little alcohol is in me
I think John will remember that birthday for a while. I'm still dying at the fact a stripper was hunting me down.
Got promoted and on my way out the door was informed that my beard makes my face perfect for riding. Today is gonna be a good day.
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like running into your ex boyfriend at the liquor store at 3 in the afternoon.
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