Whats contracted in vegas does not stay in vegas....
doctor said mango vodka does not count as my daily servings of fruit. damn.
oh hey just found a glowstick in my tits. fuck yes new years eve
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
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All I remember is you introducing yourself to the entire basketball team using the line "I'll show you a slam dunk."
Everything smells like beer. Everything. But I cant drag myself out of bed to take a shower. So beer it is.
He kept falling asleep with the pizza in his hand. I woke him up and told him and he was shocked because he thought he ate it all. Then he would end up falling asleep and we'd repeat the whole process again.
remember how i yelled at you for inviting that coke dealer to the party?! i found the $100 bill they were snorting with in the couch.
..new slutty dresses or booze? i won't even waste time with the i told you so.
My friend had to carry her up the steps on his shoulder, and then she got up, found an ironing board and set it up in my friend's room just in case he needed to iron things.
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Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
Ordered a pizza stoned. The guy handed me my pizza and I tried to pay him by handing him back the pizza.
I don't fucking know. He perched his parrot on his dick. I left after that.
And god said thou shalt never deny free booze. And it was good.
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
Just walked out of the train bathroom after having sex and got a round of applause from the passengers. Definitely the best part of the trip.
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