He made a note in his iPhone tonight so that he would remember that I rejected him.
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
there was a trail of blood coming out of one of the bathroom stalls. thought of you
REAL PEOPLE DRINK 3 BEERS ALONE WILL WATCHING THE LIFETIME MOVIE ABOUT PRINCE WILLIAM AND KATE MIDDLETON
Had to crawl to the kitchen this morning cuz I was too hung over but really wanted fruity pebbles. yes. I ate fruity pebbles on the kitchen floor.
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
Just saw a hooker eating a pastrami sandwich walking down beach blvd blowing kisses to traffic. My day = made
you're good to come back. The bouncer pulled me aside and told me. He also said you have nothing to worry about and that you have an awesome "upper punch" or some shit
the upside of dating someone over 21: he can buy me a pregnancy test AND a bottle of wine when he goes to cvs for me
Id prob hit it, but i instagram edited her picture to make her look better. Ha. She should fuck me just for that.
To show us how offended you were you took off the right foot of your pterodactyl suit and proceeded to attack us with it.
You used his ass cheeks to demonstrate how to play the bongos and he still called you the next day. That's true love.
I JUST REALIZED THAT SINCE LEIA IS TECHNICALLY A PRINCESS AND KYLO REN IS HER SON AND STAR WARS IS OWNED BY DISNEY...KYLO REN IS LITERALLY A DISNEY PRINCE.
Oh my Gods. Why. Why did you have to tell me that. D:
SO YOU CAN SUFFER HAVING THAT KNOWLEDGE TOO.
How do you nicely stand up a date that you're skipping for a 3sum
You can't say that. Only if you have peed on the side of the highway in daylight while signing Christmas songs can you say that.
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