Okay call me later ill be watching lifetime and scrubbing throw up off my feet
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw
by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix
Fuck. I just got my nipple tweaked by a plus size drag queen in a purple dress. I feel like I got molested by Grimace.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Should I be curious about Jeffrey randomly sending me a picture of him holding a crab, or just move on with my life?
And then I asked the bartender for my third shot and he told me he had to cut me off at two because this was in fact a family fun center
the bruise you left on my ass looks like africa. the other just looks like a hand.
i'm calling it my monica lewinsky shirt now. may it live forever in infamy.
Breaking a step ladder over someone's back turned into a really fun game, way too quickly.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
1. My arms are cement 2. I wish dogs could answer the phone
Should I take a fireball shot or brush my teeth?
It's not my fault you decided to fall in love with a Frodo Baggins lookalike
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
Sunday morning breakfast with the boyfriends family. I just puked in the stall at Cracker Barrell. Classy.
If I say I hate myself for it does it make it any better?
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