Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
When I saw him standing at full height, I realized exactly how much his body structure reminds me of his penis.
I want you to know that after i type the word "your" vagina is next on my predictive tex
There's an old bald Japanese dude on the metra next to me. He's drinking MGD on a crowded train, and rocking out way too hard to what may be the same Dallas Green song I'm listening to. Life is sweet.
He had a stripper pole in his bedroom. I didn't know whether to be impressed or creeped out.
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
I've decided to be proactive and make a sex playlist on my phone to avoid any awkward moments in my upcoming slutty summer
Either way, we will celebrate half Christmas the only way we can. Completely and irresponsibly wasted.
I just found out the guy that lied and blew me off got arrested, his mugshot is online. Life is good.
I think a girl on my floor is watching zombie porn. There is literally no other description for the noise coming from her room.
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
god dammit I AM NO LONGER PUTTING UP WITH YOUR HETEROSEXUALITY I QUIT
We should probably start extreme couponing for the morning after pill.
My sexual preferences tend to require a degree in psychology to understand
Omg in one week, two guys with their own names tattooed on their bodies had their tongues in my mouth. Self loathing shall commence now.
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