The guy dancing on me has three visible teeth. WHERE ARE YOU?
he's my edward cullen
I am pretty sure Edward Cullen never had an all-day drinking binge topped off with some blow.
this other lifeguard and I are actually considering paying a kid to shit in the pool
We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You gave him your vagina and this is what I get in return? This is bullshit!
awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport
Hmm. I hear gunshots, car horns blaring, hear drunk white people screaming, and see about fifty status updates pertaining to the hawks. I guess they won.
Im pretty sure it started going awry when I asked their mom "How much would it cost me to sleep with your daughters"
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You left your underwear here. I'm hanging it on my door
High water is the most godliest tasting water in the world.
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
That feels better than graduating college or that time I tried to ride a llama. Did you know they really spit?
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
There’s an entire generation of people out there who didn’t grow up watching Mr. Rogers and it shows. These Boomers need to get their shit together.
Randomize