that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
just walked by a lingerie store, the sign out front, "Specials for Father's Day", in no way is that just not wrong.
We can't all go after the girl with the low self-esteem
My coke dealer 411'd my work number just to see how I was doing and gave me his new number. He must miss my business
We almost forgot to tip the maids, so we left the rest of the gin, some tonic water and a lime. They earned it
Hillary is trying to make pickle pops with vodka and sell them to kids at the ball park.
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
Like lay upon bear skin rugs, drink brandy and reminisce of the yesteryear's before a majestic fire place? Because those are my plans.
Don't worry we will all be making bad decisions soon
That's the most comforting thing I've heard in months
Did you blow the guy you weren't supposed to hook up with again in the bathroom of pita pit? Cause that happened last night...
He just tried to eat my hair and he keeps talking about pissing on everything, come home soon I beg of you
I don't have any bail money, if that's where this conversation is going
"Just cut me in half. Then take half of me home. And leave the other half here. Cuz I can't see."
Bianca brought a stripper home he's making me breakfast
Why were u walkin around mc with a toilet bowl lid handcuffed to u and carrying a stuffed Teddy bear last night?
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