Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
Very nice. It looks like a Fisher-Price My First Dildo, but still very nice.
apparently i was cut off before i even walked in
I will miss his soup and his dick the most
It's just like riding a bike. Only it's a dude's face.
I had fun watching you interact with the world around you. Like a fuckin 8 year old kid who just discovered build a bear but really wants a cigarette.
I'll check it out in the morning. Tonight has been reserved for getting baked and covering myself in kittens because THAT IS AN OPTION.
Def just threw up beer then brushed my teeth with some randos toothpaste now back to drinkin beer
I found you in the bathroom. You were sitting cross-legged on the floor wearing nothing but socks completely surrounded by broken crayons.
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
I have chicken nuggets, lube and brand new batteries, he can stay at work charting all weekend for all I care, I'm set.
And he claims I gave him “fuck me” eyes while he was ordering me a happy meal
His beard looks like it smells like beer, cocaine and old pussy juice
It’s a good thing I’m the only one in the office today. My boy toy stopped by and now there is jiz all over my desk and couch
Randomize
