Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
i just pissed myself at work. maybe they'll buy the old coffee spill trick
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
i sold my breathalizer so i could buy weed
you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
So he told me he wanted to fertilize my caviar. Im avoiding all foreign exchange students from now on.
if you lined all their dicks up next to eachother, it would be like at&t bars
Showerbowl immediately followed by pullups naked. I feel like fucking Tarzan
Well, love is in the air. And by that I mean: it seriously smells like sex in here.
do you know where my other puke covered boot is
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
I think all the guys I've fucked in my life would get along perfectly. They'd probably form an orchestra and travel the fucking world. That gives me the slightest feeling of consistency in life which is great.
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
But I think I successfully seduced her with my alias.
Randomize
