There was a fist fight in my basement last night at four in the morning, in case you were wondering
matts gf stood and watched my naked ass gather my clothes off his floor this morning. sweet.
Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
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I'm tempted to see how fat I can get before he leaves me. It's obvious we're playing a game of chicken here.
Now that world cup is done, funneling out of a vuvuzela has lost its fun
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
I have a busted ear drum from when he honked his horn when we started to have sex on his car in the parking lot...
she fascinated with the iron the back of the toilet seat. she made me sit in the bathroom with her for a solid 10 minutes while she just stared and laughed at it
16 People Who Have Raised The Bar For Petty Revenge
You are my mentor.
I drank wine out of a protein shake bottle last night. You may want to rethink that statement.
my brain is opting to stay half drunk rather than relearn how to think. the rest of me is in no position to argue.
Is the Chairman of the College Republicans throwing upon your toilet right now? 'Murica!
Got too starbucks. 3out of the 4 girls working i have ducked and haven't ever called. My coffee has dick written on it. It may contain spit by pumpkin lattes are only once a year
Just spent 10 minutes washing away my own puke. This gas station lady loves me.
Seriously considering modifying my computer case so it can dispense wine. I need to make a bunch of changes and reorganize it's guts anyway....