Dude, I totally just put a lit lighter to my hand for 10 seconds
How much beer did you get for it?
One ice cold coors, but those mountains lied
He came through my line today and bought designer impostor perfume, just for men gel, and astroglide. I almost DIED.
So I accidentally txted this girl with the same name as the one im seeing, as it turns out shes still dtf
if he only knew that in between each sext i was puking.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just watched a woman in a full wedding dress and veil walk out of the chinese buffet...I no longer believe I have a problem, and am afraid I am underdressed.
I told him I had AIDS after he bit me. His dad cried. I think I just ruined the little guy's 3rd birthday, but he had in coming.
i think dick pics are a sign of a sexual renaissance
Woke up to my asscrack filled with melted Reese's Pieces. Halloween parties are so weird here man
I think I need a restraining order. I had 15 "selfies" of him on my camera roll......my phone has a lock code on it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
One day i'll wow you with artfully trimmed pubes.
Well waking up naked, covered in Chex mix is not how I planned to start my Wednesday if that's what you're getting at.
You thought her boot was a stray dog in your house..
I'm going to the store to get corona, salad, and blunt wraps...
Gave a guy a blowjob in a convent. Place in hell is now secured...
im tired of guys just wanting to hook up with me. im like, guys, i know im pretty and i have a slammin bod and i love making out, but cant someone treat me with respect??
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