I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
you yelled "you will never make love to jesus" and then ran into the tv.
The cop only confirmed I'm .22% Irish. Then I threw up on him.
I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
Remind me in the future that chugging dog codeine is not the best idea.
Yea he doesn't really know about any of this yet but my game plan is to keep wowing him with my vagina and cooking skills. It's up too future me to handle the rest.
I feel like the way dolphins mate would be the approach that a guy would have to use in order for you to sleep with them
He drunkenly stumbled over to me and told me my "crotch looks spectacular tonight"..... i think this could work
I don't know how to reply to him. 'I'm glad the ecstasy my friend tricked you into taking wore off'...? It just doesn't seem sincere
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
I gave you chlamydia, you gave me a concussion. Now we're even.
The fact he has had a girlfriend for 5 years and they are trying to work it out isn’t going to stop me from sleeping with him. He said it himself you can’t cheat on someone you love...
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
Randomize
