And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
The best part was her genuine shock and total "I didn't know" look when we said she couldn't cook a steak in a microwave.
He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
He was singing "i gotta feeling" under his breath as i was pulling my top off.
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This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
He just walked up to be, grabbed my boob and said 'i think they have shrunk' i have no idea who he was.
I dont care what I am for halloween, as long as i'm not a father after
Did he ask you why you were in his back yard Sunday night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's a ton of international students in my suite and I'm just sitting in this chair with no pants on eating frosted flakes
You're best friend just tackled me....naked....brought me to his room where he had freshly baked cinnamon rolls. I didn't know he could cook
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
I'M SO HIGH I FORGOT HOW TO EAT A STRAWBERRY. A FUCKING STRAWBERRY.
I woke up to him watching me sleep and after I told him it was over he asked if we were still on for Vegas next weekend
lord you gonna make me abandon my soup for tasteful catboy nudes
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