well i just puked at a family gathering so i can cross that off the bucket list
She wrote me a poem titled "Penis Flower" and it wasnt a joke
As I was going down on her I noticed she had a tatoo on her inner thigh that said "Eat it like your birthday cake".
we found him in the shower with a bottle of jose saying "this is Mexico's fault"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In a car. Threw up in my mouth. Haven't said a word in 10 minutes.
I feel like I just lived out a children's book called "The Day I Went to Law School Stoned"
You need to be more adventurous.
I am! Just not in a "I wanna get diseases" way
Hypothetically how does one go about throwing away a dildo?
Meet at Walmart straight from work to buy items for hurricane fun. Then blast some wine, make some sex, blast a bowl and cuddle each other till the sun comes up?
That's the most romantic New Orleans hurrication I've ever heard of. Can I have your babies?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
Her ex was at the party her housemates were having. He knocked on her door asking how she was while we were going at it. Turns out they were trying to work things out. Don't think I'll ever forget his face when we walked out of her room.
Yeah I'm just gonna stay here and spread my horniness to the world.
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
You know you've hit a new slutty low when you're simultaneously sexting and having a tea party with a 4 year old
God yes pancakes and booze sounds like the best night ever.
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