I told them you could toss a salad like wolfgang puck
And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
Drunk man just did a hand stand, fell over, knocked over a whole table of desserts, and didnt lose his cowboy hat. winner.
Ended up at a lesbian bar and almost got stabbed in the eye with a dart. Weirdest bachelor party ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Normal vaginal pH: 3.8 to 4.5. Of course it tastes like a 9-volt. I could run a potato clock on that thing.
i'm having taco bell mild sauce and tums for breakfast because i'm hungover and thats all i can find. it's like thanksgiving up in here
I have officially tracked lube all over our house on the bottom of my socks without knowing it. Don't slip when you come in
drunk grocery shopping was not as bad of an idea as i thought, this salmon cat food tastes a lot like tuna
Just broke my no shot rule again.. Made out with a stranger. That's 0 for 3 this month for the record
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know this is super early in advance but can I borrow your horse mask on 4/20
I'm hoping the sedatives kick in before I drunkenly decide to eat this whole cheesecake.
just the thought of you slurpin down noodles really rustles my jimmy
you suck at sexting
Might call you tomorrow on a drunken hate filled rant, or just a normal hate filled rant, either way be ready.
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
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