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• (770): View more from Georgia

  The difference between what I would do for a regular Klondike bar and an Oreo flavored Klondike bar is astounding

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• (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  The online application for Mcdonald's said I could do incredible things there. Today I threw out shit filled underwear in the women's restroom and escorted a very drunk/high 42 year old man outside after he ordered a 5 dollar foot long and a bloody mary.

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• (617): View more from Massachusetts

  i had to write a bad check to buy franzia last weekend. i have my priorities in line.

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• (925): View more from California

  I walked in on her just letting her nose bleed into her friend's hands

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  23 Parents Gave Awful Advice about “The Birds and the Bees”

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  He just kept screaming "I have democratic immunity" as the cops dragged him into the car.

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• (602): View more from Arizona

  By this time tomorrow I expect us to be sitting at the kitchen table either playing a drinking game, or crying. Set an alarm

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• (310): View more from California

  Ok, it is technically a gay bar but it's a total dive w/ strong drinks. The important thing is you can start drinking at 11:00 am without judgement

  (310): View more from California

  oh oh oh, and apparently you can bring in your own snacks. Some old dude just gave me cashews and cheetos.

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• (425): View more from Washington

  One step ahead. Always. Roses are red, violets are blue... I'm gonna fuck you with a rake.

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• (248): View more from Michigan

  My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge

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• 

  These 19 Deaths Are Ironically Hilarious

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (262): View more from Wisconsin

  he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready

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• (310): View more from California

  He woke up in a dragon costume, covered in bong water. That was a party we will regret missing.

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• (714): View more from California

  I woke up with a meat pie in my hand and my mouth tasting like an ashtray. I'm a catch, really!

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• (585): View more from New York

  He yelled "HOO-ah!" like Al Pacino when he pulled down his pants. Trust me, he has every right to.

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• (913): View more from Kansas

  Literally I can feel my heart beat in my vagina because of how sore I am

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• (603): View more from New Hampshire

  That female nurse who took a selfie with my man parts well I was out of it just got fired and arrested... You know all she had to do was ask lol

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