Texts From Last Night

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  (518): View more from New York

  He looks like a mix between a retired piano teacher and a cat that just swallowed a sock.

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  (518): He looks like a mix between a retired piano teacher and a cat that just swallowed a sock. http://tfl.nu/iuj0
  Replies (4) Good night (613) Bad night (2325) Order T-Shirt
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  (713): View more from Texas

  All the good ones are taken. All that's left is the Harry Potter geek or the asshole in the corner. I think I'll settle for Harry Potter.

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  (713): All the good ones are taken. All that's left is the Harry Potter geek or the asshole in the corner. I think I'll settle for Harry Potter. http://tfl.nu/461a
  Replies (32) Good night (1408) Bad night (2473) Order T-Shirt
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  (619): View more from California

  you really should stop posting my phone number on craigslist as tranny seeking tranny, last night i answered at family dinner and almost choked on my hot dog

  (716): View more from New York

  do you not see the irony in that??

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  (619): you really should stop posting my phone number on craigslist as tranny seeking tranny, last night i answered at family dinner and almost choked on my hot dog (716): do you not see the irony in that?? http://tfl.nu/h8wi
  Replies (73) Good night (15887) Bad night (1034)
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  (631): View more from New York

  Is it wrong of me that I wish I could be a midget for a day so I can give head standing up?

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  (631): Is it wrong of me that I wish I could be a midget for a day so I can give head standing up? http://tfl.nu/k005
  Replies (56) Good night (6487) Bad night (1286) Order T-Shirt
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  (847): View more from Illinois

  Im making the walk of shame with half a box of pizza, its like when youre little and you get a goodie bag leaving the party

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  (847): Im making the walk of shame with half a box of pizza, its like when youre little and you get a goodie bag leaving the party http://tfl.nu/77aw
  Replies (15) Good night (6679) Bad night (506) Order T-Shirt
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  (507): View more from Minnesota

  So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.

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  (507): So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there. http://tfl.nu/r47h
  Replies (10) Good night (5711) Bad night (572) Order T-Shirt
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  (401): View more from Rhode Island

  Renamed my iPod as 'the titantic' so when I plug it in it's says 'the titantic is syncing.'

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  (401): Renamed my iPod as 'the titantic' so when I plug it in it's says 'the titantic is syncing.' http://tfl.nu/mde3
  Replies (248) Good night (66809) Bad night (3032) Order T-Shirt
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  (717): View more from Pennsylvania

  no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets

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  (717): no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets http://tfl.nu/m579
  Replies (5) Good night (3507) Bad night (609) Order T-Shirt
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  (620): View more from Kansas

  new girl just came onto the hall stumbling drunk with no shoes on and the guy who brought her doesn't have them either

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  (620): new girl just came onto the hall stumbling drunk with no shoes on and the guy who brought her doesn't have them either http://tfl.nu/a5gg
  Replies (3) Good night (2057) Bad night (760) Order T-Shirt
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  (478): View more from Georgia

  All I remember is you introducing yourself to the entire basketball team using the line "I'll show you a slam dunk."

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  (478): All I remember is you introducing yourself to the entire basketball team using the line "I'll show you a slam dunk." http://tfl.nu/3sim
  Replies (10) Good night (3186) Bad night (1020) Order T-Shirt
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  (253): View more from Washington

  Why is there a keg in our kitchen? I'm not complaining but why is there a keg in our kitchen?

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  (253): Why is there a keg in our kitchen? I'm not complaining but why is there a keg in our kitchen? http://tfl.nu/9r46
  Replies (14) Good night (2533) Bad night (634) Order T-Shirt
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  (516): View more from New York

  Def something wrong w taking plan b with your daughters juice box

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  (516): Def something wrong w taking plan b with your daughters juice box http://tfl.nu/dk8b
  Replies (9) Good night (513) Bad night (1393) Order T-Shirt
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  (902): View more from Pr Edwrd Is, Nva Sctia

  You rolled around on the floor, yelled about being a "half-zombie" and bit that guy on the leg who was hitting on me.

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  (902): You rolled around on the floor, yelled about being a "half-zombie" and bit that guy on the leg who was hitting on me. http://tfl.nu/23cm
  Replies (3) Good night (905) Bad night (270) Order T-Shirt
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  (678): View more from Georgia

  I started crying then my dog licked his dick so yeah.. Kind of ruined the moment.

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  (678): I started crying then my dog licked his dick so yeah.. Kind of ruined the moment. http://tfl.nu/mk4n
  Replies (5) Good night (246) Bad night (889) Order T-Shirt
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  (661): View more from California

  Is valentines day the worst or best day to ask for a threesome? I'm weighing some options on this high-risk manoeuvre.

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  (661): Is valentines day the worst or best day to ask for a threesome? I'm weighing some options on this high-risk manoeuvre. http://tfl.nu/eizk
  Replies (4) Good night (580) Bad night (383) Order T-Shirt

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