Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...
Our brains have an emergency blowjob override switch. You saw proof tonight.
test run with donkey pinata disastrous. broken glass and tequila EVERYWHERE
It smells like someone died in our apartment and ya'll used some random orifice of his body to smoke weed out of. Side note, how did we get a guitar?
Finally better. I had to use eye makeup remover to get the purple wine stains off my lips
I've used my house key more to do bumps of coke than I've used it to get in my house.
Dropping the entire last roll of TP into the toilet is a hurt you don't want to know.
My fake id got more birthday sex than I've had in my life.
I think that thing where I have 2 boyfriends is happening again
We joked about how funny it would be if he got pulled over with 300 breakfast burritos in hus car. We walk outside of the school just as the police lights turn on and pull him over
My fridge is empty and all of my food is in the bathtub. Just.. Why?
My boobs keep hanging out of this shirt. I think thats the style I'm going for tonight
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
I was a psycho gf all the time...I'm sorry
I was drunk 90% of the time...tit for tat
Randomize