can you explain why there is a dead rabbit in my front seat?
idk, I had a turtle in mine.
just customized my debit card w a pic of me ralphing over the toilet. figure it'll give the bar keep a good cut off est and for shits n giggles when buying my handles at the liqour store
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
You both must have been completely wasted because every once in a while we would hear you both stop and start singing to each other. At one point it was taylor swift.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
To say the least, now you know you're a proper lady, passing a field sobriety test in heels...
You need to come over. I cant get her to stop eating honey mustard straight from the squeeze bottle
I woke up smelling like the ciroc you tried pouring into my mouth last night. I think my clothes are still soaked
Dude, you passed out sitting straight up AND in mid sentence last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
I tried to pay my tab and go home but she wrote me a "list of things I'm good at" with fellatio as no 1...
You pissed off the back deck while listening to the national anthem from your phone screaming America Fuck Yea to my neighbors
Not entirely sure how I got drunk off 2 mimosas but here I am
I would wear his ballsack as a hat if he asked me to
YOU WAXED MY CAT YOU SICK FUCK
Randomize