If I could text you the sound of me vomming, I would.
yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
True life I used my fake as a photo id for my final. My professor told me good luck and laughed. Hope the bouncers are in the St. Patrick's day spirit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
i walked toward the cop car thinking it was the liquor store lights nd by that time it was too late to escape the trap
So he told me he didn't have a condom, paused, and then said "so, pulling out" and tried to high five me.
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
My contribution to the dinner party was a bottle of vodka and a bag of uncooked potatoes. I felt like a Russian serf.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At some point you realize they're vacuuming and you still have to sober up. Please find me a boyfriend thanks .
You will go out on a boat of flames filled with honor, sarcasm, and assholery, let me assure you.
Telling someone to make good decisions on a Thursday is like telling Santa to be Jewish.
What alcohol should i drink Saturday to completely hate life?
never stay at a party until 5am. even if it's because of daylight savings. we ended up having to watch porn with the host's dad...
Do you want to go soon I'm overthinking life and my butthole again
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