Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
Haha so you are never gonna want to meet my mom now...she just found your thong in her front seat
her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
just next time i won't let coke make me think I'm superman and drink a shit ton.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I realized I was officially over him when I was getting a lap dance on the keg bus at 3am from his old boss and I was double fisting:)
Remind me tomorrow that I was taking shots of burnetts in the subway line while placing my order
Update- I sold my hat to some drunk kid for 50 bucks. I used my earnings to buy beer on the way home. I realize to everyone else seeing me drinking on my balcony at 6am, I look like an alcoholic, but I'm thinking of it as a night cap
I would let Bear Grills repel down a waterfall using my dick if I could go to sleep right now.
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
Why did you load my phone up with pics of Al Gore?
This chick had a condom box organized by size with dividers that glowed in the dark.
It's something you'd find in the room outside of Ben Carson's sex dungeon
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
There are leaves in my underwear?
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