I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
smoked weed with Joakim Noah last night....if he was half as fast to the basket as he is to grab a joint from me we'd have another championship on our hands
I'm gagging in the liquor aisle just thinking about how much alcohol I'll be drinking this weekend.
That's why you NEVER put anything a stripper gave you in your mouth
Just put the gallon of milk in the microwave. Dad might know im high.
hooked up with the gay kid & his friend's mom told me "you know he has a identical twin brother whose straight, right?"
Just walked into the bar to find a guy in a Boba Fett helmet leaning casually against the wall, texting. This night just got real.
Apparently I'm not allowed to call at 3am anymore and ask to speak to all his siblings. I was just trying to get to know the family
I don't remember, but I believe your goodnight phrase was "nice meeting you, thanks for not macing me"
I'm going to have to go for it. It's like Mt. Everest. It's large and unpredictable but I live for adventure and it's worth never coming back from. Mt. BigDick.
He went in for a kiss so I shook his hand instead.
Where'd you go?
Laundry, im. A responsible drunk
i woke up this morning with a fake eyeball in my pocket
One day I'm going to get tired of waking up and wondering where the glow sticks on the floor came from.
Randomize
