dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
Just walk straight and zig zag through cars tell you get to the road. That's where I am. Perpendicular to the doors do not make any turns
Dude you were sitting on a bench on the street with her for 45 minutes thinking you were on the bus
Hey your work video crashed my computer. The 8 pornos running in the other window didn't. Congratulations.
And all you did was hit on me and do things "for America", so you weren't judged heavily
She seriously left me for a guy that likes his own statuses on facebook.....
Oh my fucking god how fucking embarrassing never again will I mix drugs at a family barbecue
I'm never going out with the ashleys again. it was whoreible. terrifyingly whoreible.
I just wrote my resume on the same park bench I got felt up at in freshman year of highschool... I've truly come full circle
I left at 4:30 in the morning and I told him it was because I had to take my contacts out
Look I'm really hungover so let's try this again. In 5 mins you're gonna call me and tell me that you're on your way with xannies, iced coffee and a back rub
I THINK HE DOES. OMG!!!!! OMG I FUCKED A GUY W A FAKE LEG AND I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW!!!!!!????!!!!!!!!!
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
I just remembered that I totally burped into someones mouth when we were making out. I was really smooth about it so he didn't notice.
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