HIV tests are more positive than that guy
I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
I've banged too many servicemen's wives to still be considered an American.
Margaritas are 250 calories. Now measuring all food in margaritas
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
I'm in his phone as "nashville blowjob" he also has "cleveland blowjob" "vegas blowjob" etc. i'm okay with this.
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
Im surprised putting the throwing knife "dartboard" next to the door didnt end up worse
God you people are gross. Come collect your unconscious friend.
Just fucked in a kitchen. I never want my penis that close to knives, stoves, or blenders ever again.
I have better things to do with my life than be faithful.
I wish I was there to have sex with you on the plane to lessen your anxiety.
That's the nicest thing anyone has over said to you.
I have the relationship skills of Miley Cyrus and I could've said this was a bad idea
You know i love you, but i just cannot fuck you until your eyebrow grows back. It's too hard not to laugh.
Randomize
