yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
I should be nowhere even remotely near facebook in this condition.
It was literally like being eaten out by a dog. That bad.
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
This is to remind you the pizza is in the dishwasher birthday boy eat it before it goes on
I'm out of mixers so I am using sugar water. Times are tough.
Yeah, you're right, it's a conspiracy against you. This small tight knit group of people who don't like assholes.
Worst luck of my entire life. Came in my own mouth
When we picked him up this morning the cop said that if they actually arrested every drunk American who pissed on cathedral doors, Spain wouldn't have any room for real prisoners.
Alright, text me when you get close. I've got a mustache and I'm ready to get my day drunk on.
The only times girls talk to me at clubs is when they're asking if I'm okay when I'm puking outside. Or if it's a tranny
It's the best! If I had one wish it would be for life to be one really long gay porno. Thats what I wish for during every 11:11.
I STILL HAVE A HARD TIME DECIDING WHAT TO WEAR IN THE MORNING HOW WOULD IT BE POSSIBLE FOR ME TO PICK A PAIR OF PANTS AND GO OH ILL JUST WEAR THESE FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE
My boyfriend just called me on his poop break from work.... Is that what you meant by moving too fast?
Our baby is creepy.
That's how we know it's ours. haha
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