So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
eye of the tiger was playing while i pooped... it totally helped.
when my professor asked "does anyone know what streches across south america" and a kid in the back row said "my exgirfriends vagina" i knew i was at home.
I found her under my bed eating airplane pretzels.
Now she's making me sit here and look at pictures of guys she likes who look like bears. She's calling them her bear friends.
He said I did a backflip off the thing on the doorframe and busted my ass. I'd give anything to remember
I almost itched my nose with the lit end of a cigarette. Help.
Hey do you have any hot friends that would settle for less?
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
You haven't demanded nudes today. You alright?
I always felt my time would come in the form of a tidal wave of whisky
She turned off her phone alarm (which was the theme song to Star Wars) and then asked me if I wanted a blow job before she went...of course I am going to see her again.
Randomize
