ironically, his detergent was also "small and mighty"
it was just fiscally responsible to stop going to strip clubs where the strippers recognized me
There is a pink thong attached to a bottle of svedka hanging from my ceiling fan..is this yours?
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
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I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
My cab driver just texted me 'goodnight beautiful'. I think my 'desperate for a guy phase' has just moved into a fuck my life phase.
There's strippers and bear every where so ether you gave me the wrong address or this is the coolest birthday party thrown for a seven year old ever.
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
I was trying to climb into what I thought was a bunk bed.. Turns out it was just a cabinet under the sink in a bathroom
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Let's run into the wild and just eat berries and have sex all the time.
It was his birthday and he drunkenly offered me Portillo's and diamonds in exchange for a snap chat of my boobs. Even sober it seemed like a good idea at 3 in the morning.
Sometimes you just have to have sex for a Netflix password.
How exactly does one go about seducing an older, possibly blind gentleman?
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
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