He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
Call 911 I'm faking my own death so this fat chick leaves my room
Speaking of roommates, Kelsey and I woke up to urine in our trash can. Neither one of us is willing to admit to it so we've come to the conclusion that someone snuck into our room in the middle of the night
Sorry about all of the penis things that happened last night.
Well since your going through her phone..look man she loves you..she just loves my dick more
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
All I'm saying is that any 24 year old guy who sends me a snapchat from the vantage point of his dick with the caption "hiding behind my weiner" is off my list potentially dateable guys.
Only you would have a vasectomy while you're awake and report on the soundtrack first
You have talents. You got me laid two weekends in a row in two different cities.
... Okay, fine. But I don't want to be a better person tonight. I'll be a better person tomorrow.
Who the fuck stole my fridge again
He started talking about getting a puppy together. So of course I went down on him later
Randomize
