I will die if light touches me.
I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
im learning from these one night stands last time i came in her this time i came on her AND deleted every contact in her phone!
A chick at the bar last night took my black berry, looked at my Brick Breaker score and told me she couldnt take someone that has a lower score than her seriously.
Just sold this kid "Magic Furry Apples". He is way to high to figure out they are just peaches.
At least he's a nutritious stoner...
Somewhere between catching the stove on fire and not being aware of it being on fire while I'm in the living room. I drank too much.
This girl can open a bottle without using her hands and she's 21. She meets my standards
it's kinda bad that we're already planning travel arrangements to his funeral
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
I opened my door to find him standing there with vodka, McDonalds, a smile and a hard-on. Of course I let him in.
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
Getting my nails done with Diana... I'm going for the keep your friends close and the girl who's dating the guy you want to fuck closer
Dude, he's legal now. You could not pry me from his dick with the jaws of life.
I swear you won't find cereal in your washer machine again.
As she came, she moaned Roll Tide. I kid you not.
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