Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
Bar closing I am hiding in the bathroom. do you think anyone will find me?
you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
we were so high we made up an elaborate backstory because we were paranoid about going into the wig shop w/o being serious wig shoppers
Took his v-card last night. Yet another experience I didn't expect to have in my thirties.
It's been five and a half years since she and my brother stopped dating. I feel like that's a long enough grace period. Going for it.
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
I told the bartender that he could give me back the tip I gave him if he outsmarted me in a battle of wits. He has yet to challenge me.
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
Is putting "Tonight I'm Fucking You" on my date playlist too forward?
Don't mind me. My boyfriend is carrying me because I'm broken not because I'm drunk.
It's not even 9:30 yet..
I just spent 20 mins in the shower washing n rewashing my body to get rid of stripper. I even loofa'd my face.
Got drunk with him at an Irish pub ended up losing him for twenty minutes when I finally find him his piss drunk singing Irish folk music with a group of Irish guys and a midget
He meets the coolest people when he's drunk
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
Randomize
