I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
Thanks for stopping me from doing a one man keg stand by myself clad in only a towel. that probably wouldve ended badly.
There's some drunk girl alone in the field, she looks like she could use some help.
Also it's only fair that you know that that girl is me.
If you ever bitch out on 72oz margarita night again, this friendship is over
Douche bag was crowd surfing, sack punched him. Crowd carried him away in a ball of agony. LIFE=COMPLETE.
I forgot I did whipits. Probably because my brain cells were killed from the whipits
I can get stoned and we can bake and then I can eat 70% of it and it will be awesome
Woke up this morning with an extra $35 and someone else's ATM receipt. How much did I drink last night?
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
It's like an adderall Houdini. Right when you think you have a deal he disappears
The more I think about it, the more convinced I am that I'm the solution to all of T-Swift's guy problems.
I may be a complete scumbag but even im not willing to spend a grand and sit on a plane for 24 hours just for shrooms and a blowjob
YOLO is a great motto until you end up with Chlamydia
Oh and people at work think i got knocked up so my gay roomie is claiming it as his lol
Sitting across the table from one of my high school teachers who hasn't seen me since I was about 16 drinking a beer wearing a leotard
Randomize
