I almost didn't recognize her with a shirt on.
it was like his penis was on wheels.
Performed a legit marriage between 2 drunk people at last call yesterday. Becoming ordained has already paid for itself.
she was giving me head and that cheryl crow 'youre favorite mistake' song came on. she looks up and all i could do was nod
23 Theme Park Employees Confess The Biggest Adult Tantrums They’ve Witnessed
I swear if his heart was half the size of the cum stains he's left on my sheets we would have the perfect relationship
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
You made me wash my hair in the kitchen sink while eating bay leaves
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
23 Crazy Psychological Tricks You Have To Try on Someone RIGHT NOW
he was spitting whole peanuts projectile out of his mouth at the waitresses as they walked by and then yelled across the restaurant that he had "no problem kicking any of their asses"
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
That was the #1 scariest moment in my life. I have full trust in you, I let you bite my penis for god sake.
I mean he gave me an 'I owe you an orgasm' fist bump
$150 and 3 orgasms. Dogsitting is awesome.
I can still taste the Jäger. I'm gonna shoot myself.